He does not like to sleep and fights it as though he'll die if he falls asleep. I have tried every method suggested to me and nothing works. Last night it took me an hour and forty-five minutes to get him to sleep. I placed him in his crib six different times. Finally I nursed him until he fell asleep and held him on the pillow in my lap for an extra five minutes to make really sure that he was asleep before gently transferring him to his crib. His eyes flew open and he howled with protest. I shut the door so that I could collect myself before snatching him back up. I was tired, frustrated and even a little angry at my baby. I'd had a 13 hour day already (not counting the hour during which they both napped- a minor miracle unto itself) and I was raw around the edges, so I waited before going back into his room.
He was quiet. Then he began crying afresh. Then he was quiet. Then he cried. This cycle sometimes happens when he is finally winding down for the night, but it's unpredictable. Sometimes he winds down and goes to sleep. Sometimes he winds himself up and goes into a full-out screamfest. I never know which one it's going to be until it's over.
I stood at the top of the stairs for fifteen minutes while he went through this cycle of crying and quieting. I wanted my day to be done. I wanted a little bit of time to myself before heading to bed.
Henry is 11 months old and I still don't get him. He has no routine that he sticks to. He's still a mystery to me. I am surprised by this. I study my children and Ted has been so easy to read- Is he cranky? If so then he's
1) Hungry
2) Tired
3) Overwhelmed
That's Ted's list.
Henry's list is different.
Is Henry cranky? If so then he's
1) Hungry
2) Tired
3) Suffering from some mystery ailment that I'll never be able to decipher
More often than not, it's number 3. Last night was this way. I'd given him some Tylenol in case he was teething (he's chewing on his fingers these days) but he didn't want me to hold him. He didn't want me to put him down. He wasn't hungry. His pjs weren't binding. His diaper was fresh and dry. It was comfortable in the house. He was clearly tired, but he wouldn't go to sleep.
Mostly Henry is bubbly, happy and engaging. I couldn't love him more. He's cuddly with both Nate and myself and he adores his brother. When he's being difficult, though, he has no rival. He is immensely frustrating. I hope it's a phase as opposed to him asserting a part of his personality that will manifest itself in various ways in the future. I just can't figure out this child of mine.
Oh, Henry! What am I going to do with you?
1 comment:
Hi Betsy,
Have you tried a radio or some type of background noise for his room?
When our twins were little, my husband's job had some late-start days and some evening hours, so he would be home with them in the morning by himself while I was at work (cut down on daycare costs). He also had a list if somebody cried - diaper (check), last fed (check), needs burping (check), pacifier (check), pulling on ears (my son always had ear problems), etc. Usually, by the time he was done with the list, he had things resolved.
When somebody was really overtired, I used to rock them, but they were bundled up really tight, so they couldn't wiggle around. Lights were dimmed or off, so there weren't any visual distractions. Then, I would rock, as far forward and as far back as the chair would go, quite fast to begin with, gradually slowing down.
We couldn't leave one crying too long in the bedroom if the other one was sleeping (small house at that time). I have to say, I really don't remember having to do that too often (of course that could be amnesia from sleeplessness).
My next younger son would sleep/nap in the living room, at a picnic or family gathering, anywhere. It didn't matter if you vacuumed or the kids were being loud or whatever, but, if you moved him to the bedroom where it was quiet once he fell asleep, he was instantly awake, which is why I asked about the background noise. It was just too quiet for him.
Hope you figure something out that works for your household soon. It is no fun being frustrated with them.
Lesa
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